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Saturday, September 26, 2009

Our Deepest Fear

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us, it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” - Marianne Williamson

My mirror has cracked. One by one pieces are falling onto the floor, with a soft, wet thud in the darkness at my feet. I'm confused, because with each piece that falls I brace myself for the loud shatter of glass.

But there is none. Just a muffled, damp thud . . . thud . . . thud.

My identity is skewed, and I panic because I can no longer see my reflection . . .

Something's happening.

I can now see that behind my mirror is another . . . this one somehow different. The person I see is still recognizable as myself, but the colors are brighter; the darkness that enveloped me before is now gone, replaced by a light so beautiful that it glows out of the frame and into the room.

And in this new light, I can now see the reason for my confusion. My cracked mirror wasn't a mirror at all, but a painting of sorts, fastened over the reflection of my true self. A painting fashioned by my own hand. A self-proclaimed masterpiece of dark impressionism, where the subject is hinted at and the truth about my identity has been made relevant to the point of absurdity . . . almost to the point of treason.

And I've been comfortable with that . . . until now.

But now my facade has been broken.

My last-ditch attempts to control my own image have been supremely thwarted by the very One who created me.

He wants to show everyone my true reflection . . . of His glory . . . in me.

I have been hiding behind what I used to be, finding a sick, twisted comfort in the familiar rags of MY painting, but that will not do.

He is exposing me for who I am NOW.

I am Royalty. A child of Heaven. A shining witness of Redemption to all the world.

My deepest fear is realized.

© Copyright Derek Hickman 2009

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